Looking something up in a dictionary takes time.
(…) I call that hesitation.
From Anne Carson’s 2024 interview published in *The Paris Review Daily*
The book I flipped through most during my school days was the *Concise English-Korean Dictionary*. It had darkened to the point of being pitch-black from hand oil, with countless underlines scribbled across its pages. Since my mother had received it as a prize in an intra-school running competition during her student years, I could almost hear the sound of her slicing through the wind as she ran every time I swiftly drew a line under a word.
After transitioning to the era of online dictionaries, perhaps the “time of hesitation” has only increased. The variety of dictionaries to consult for confirming meanings has multiplied. Yet, for some reason, words seem to float in the air without rushing directly into my mind. Is it because they’ve lost their physicality? When I feel hollow, I write something by hand. Drawing a line under a book I’m reading or writing anything at all makes my existence feel slightly less insubstantial.
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